Understanding Teenagers

Wardrobe wars

Whether it’s clothes, electronics, make-up or music, teenagers can be extremely territorial about their stuff, leading to spectacular bust-ups over who raided whose wardrobe or didn’t return something that they borrowed, and didn’t even have permission to borrow in the first place. As the parent you can: mediate endlessly,   lose your patience, or encourage …

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Take the ‘fight’ out of your voice

It’s easy to get into conflict with our kids. They ignore us, we raise our voices, they fight back etc. We, the big people, need to be strong, loving, flexible and available. And that might mean we need to take responsibility for our own frustrations, irritations or impatience rather than projecting it onto our kids …

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Grunts and Eye Rolls, Finding a Better Way to Communicate

Sometimes it can be very frustrating communicating with an adolescent. The old saying “It’s not what you say, it’s how you say it” is particularly relevant when dealing with adolescents. Not only are they undergoing huge personal physical, social, psychological and emotional change, but communication patterns are also undergoing a transformation. This is NOT the …

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Dealing with a Teen that Self Harms

“Self-harming” is when people cause themselves physical pain in the hope that it will alter their mood state. This is not the same as “wanting to die” and most who self-harm are not suicidal.  Some people harm themselves because they feel disconnected and isolated from everybody, and hurting themselves is the only way they feel …

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Six Strategies to Boost Self-Worth

Children and ‘self-esteem’ is heard regularly in the media, however self-efficacy is the term used in psychology and refers to a person’s belief in his/her own competence. It has nothing to do with being boastful or proud, rather having a healthy view of one’s own characteristics or abilities and what one can offer the world. …

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Dealing with a Teen that Self Harms

Self-harming is when people cause themselves physical pain in the hope that it will alter their mood state. Some people harm themselves because they feel disconnected and isolated from everybody, and hurting themselves is the only way they feel real or connected. People who cut often start cutting in their young teens. If your teen …

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